


I dare you

by Yakashi



Series: The walls can't talk but the narrator can [2]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Dare War, Family, Fluff, Jokes, M/M, No Angst, RIP ceiling fan, Shenanigans, beach, broken things, bros, fed up daichi, just fun, suga is a literal angel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-10
Updated: 2019-05-10
Packaged: 2020-02-29 15:20:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,773
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18780916
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yakashi/pseuds/Yakashi
Summary: Bokuto and Kuroo have a dare war. Shenanigans ensue





	I dare you

Daichi was the luckiest man on earth. He went to a nice school, great friends, had an amazing volleyball career, and had the sexiest boyfriend on the planet. Speaking of his boyfriend, the silver haired vixen was currently on his lap grinding into him. They were on Daichi’s bed and it was getting steamy. Lips were moving and Suga was doing that thing with his tongue. Daichi was the luckiest man on Earth. Daichi had just removed his own shirt when-

Crash!

“What the fuck was that?!” Suga had immediately moved to get up, but Daichi pulled him back down.

“It’s probably just the guys being guys, don’t worry about it baby.” Daichi went back to kissing that sweet spot on Suga’s neck. “Mmm Dai..” Jackpot. Daichi was getting him some sweet sweet Suga.

Boom!

“I’m just gonna go check on them.” Suga got up and lightly shut the bedroom door. Daichi had to take a few deep breaths. Why was his boyfriend such an angel.

“DAICHI!” Suga shrieked, and in the blink of an eye Daichi sprinted out of his room. His sprint came to a screeching halt when he saw the disaster in the living room. 

The dining table was in shards, various bits of shrapnel were all over the floor. Hallway on top of the broken table was none other than Bokuto Kotarou taped to the ceiling fan. Well what was left of the ceiling fan. Daichi looked up and there was a gaping hole with dangling wires signaling where the ceiling fan was supposed to be.

Kuroo was hovering around laughing his ass off. Suga was untaping a chuckling Bokuto. Daichi continued to survey the damage. Most repairs were covered by maintenance but how do they even explain this? Plus they need a new table. Once Suga assessed everyone and made sure they were okay, Daichi decided to speak up. 

He cleared his throat.

Everyone paused.

“Ok now Sawamura I know you’re mad but first, -” Kuroo grabbed Suga and placed him right in front protecting him and Bokuto from the the direct path of a soon to be raging Daichi. “- ok now continue.”

Suga shrugged as he continued to protect them. Daichi was glaring but Suga wasn’t backing down. He knew Daichi was going to be upset with the money from the damages, but money spent on two funerals would just make him more upset.

He was being considerate really.

After his stare down with Suga that was inevitably going to end in Suga’s favor, Daichi released the breathe he didn’t know he was holding. 

“ What the hell even happened?” Daichi asked calmly.

Bokuto piped up, “I didn’t perform the dare and so this was my punishment.”

Suga was puzzled, “ the dare?”

Daichi pinched his nose, “These two idiots are involved in some dare war with each other. They dare each other to do DUMB SHIT and if they refuse or don’t execute it correctly, then they have to do other dumb shit.”

“Right, so I dared Bokuto to prank call his job and he said no so he had to be taped to the ceiling fan and take a ride on it.” 

“Yea, it only made sense, we didn’t think the ceiling fan would fall down.”

Dumb and dumber explained things as if it all made perfect sense and this was just an inevitable freak accident. 

Daichi sighed, no matter how much logic he used, he knew it would be useless, “Ok guys well clean this up. I’ll call maintenance.” He took Suga’s hand, “I’m sorry babe. I need to take care of this.”

Suga gave his reassuring smile and kissed him on the cheek, “It’s ok, I’ll see you later tonight at my place?”

“Absolutely.” Daichi left to go fetch his phone from his bedroom.

“Wow thanks Suga momma!” Bokuto cheered as they avoided the terror that was Daichi.

Sugawara grabbed both Bokuto and Kuroo by the collar and whispered in their ear. “ Listen up, if you two ever disrupt my sexy time with Daichi ever again I promise you I will I will make your lives so miserable that you wish you only had Daichi to deal with. Do. You. Understand?”

The two nodded their heads furiously. Suga smoothed out their collars. “Good. Now you guys better get cleaning. I want Daichi over by 7 and it’s already 5”. Suga walked out the door with poise and grace as if nothing even happened.

“I’ve never felt fear like that in my life.” Bokuto commented as he felt his heart slow back down.

“ Devil in disguise.” Kuroo agreed.

\----------------

Daichi surveyed the room. It was still only half cleaned. “Jeez guys this is a lot. It looks like I’m gonna have to cancel on Suga.”

“NO!” The two screamed in unison. 

“I mean no, me and Bo got the rest covered. You go shower and spend time with your man.”

Daichi looked with suspicion, “Are you sure? Suga’s an angel and he I’m sure he’d understand.”

“Of course, you go have fun… and don’t tell Suga we’re still cleaning.”

“Uhh okay.”  
\--------------------

Daichi sat on his couch waiting for Iwaizumi. He leaned his head back and noticed the edges of the silly flag on their wall, reminiscing the memories of that chat.

Bokuto- Guys. So I was talking with Akaashi and they just got a flag that says “Pretty Setters Club”

Daichi- Well they are in fact pretty setters. Koushi being the king of pretty

Iwaizumi- Subjectively and objectively that title belongs to Tooru

Bokut-You both misspelled Keiji but the point is we should get a flag...for solidarity

Daichi-I guess we can

Bokuto-Come on guys please???

Daichi-Fine, but what should it say?

Iwaizumi-How about sexy spiker alliance?

Bokuto- OH MY GOD YES

Kuroo- wow can’t believe none of you guys can spell Kozume. Such illerates

Kuroo changed the name of the group chat to Sexy Spiker Alliance

Daichi couldn’t help but smile. He loved his roommates even though they could be aggravating.

 

Iwaizumi entered the room, “Hey man what’s up?” He toed off his shoes and plopped down next to Daichi.

“It’s this dare war. It’s getting way out of hand.”

“Ugh tell me about about it. The other day I came home to Kuroo vomiting after drinking a blend of mayo, ketchup, pickle juice, and chocolate milk.”

Daichi ran his hands through his hair, “What are they 12?!”

Iwaizumi shrugged, “I guess so. Now how do you propose we stop this?”

Daichi gave a sinister smile, ‘It’s simple, we infiltrate and then attack from the inside.”

“Go on,” Iwaizumi responded.

“Well here’s the plan…”

Iwaizumi nodded, “It’s so crazy it just might work.”

\-----------------

 

The state fair was one of the best attractions in the city. There were games, rides, and overpriced food. Couples, friends, and families all had something to do. The day was even perfect. The skies were blue, the sun was shining, and the beach was nearby. It was spectacular.

Unless you were Daichi, who was literally about to hurl.

He was leaned over the tras hcan with a loving Suga giving him water to calm his stomach. Thank goodness for Suga.

They walked back over to the rest of the guys, sitting at a bench. “Great job Sawamura! I didn’t think you’d had it in you! I mean four consecutive rides on the tilt-a-whirl!” Kuroo praised.

Daichi responded, “A dare’s a dare and momma ain’t raise no bitch.” Daichi laid his head down on Suga’s lap while Suga petted his hair and gave soft words of encouragement.

The dares didn’t stop there.

“Kuroo I dare you to eat that hot dog in two bites!” Bokuto yelled

“Oh you’re on.” 

Let’s just say that spectacle left Kenma a blushing mess.

\--

The beach was right next to the fair and Oikawa recommended they go for a swim. The sun was setting leaving a beautiful array of blues and pinks. Suga was snuggled with a now calm daichi. Iwaizumi had a sleepy Oikawa in his arms. It was perfect.

Off in the distance Bokuto and Kuroo were doing push ups trying to impress the setters that had their hearts.

It was now time to put the plan into action.

“Hey Bo! Kuroo! I have the dare to end all dares!” Daichi called out.

Obviously excited the two ran to hear the idea.

“I dare you two to play me and Iwa in a game of chicken. If you lose the dare war ends. If you win then Iwaizumi and I will streak the entire campus. Twice.”

It was too good to give up.

“OHOHOH! You’re on.”

The guys were set up. Daichi had Iwaizumi on his shoulders while Kuroo supported Bokuto.

“Ready. Set. GO!”

The two pushed themselves back and forth. Daichi kept himself balanced. As long as he stayed up, Iwaizumi could stay up. He was never more thankful for his thighs. 

“Hey Daichi, you guys should just quit right now! We got this in the bag. Bo and I are chicken champions!”

He wasn’t wrong. They were back to back chicken champions, but they don’t have a scheming Daichi,

“Wow you’re right Kuroo. We better end this fast so we don’t hurt any more fish.”

Daichi grounded his feet more as he felt the tugging from above.

“Fish?” Kuroo questioned.

“Oh yea the beach has tons of fish just swimming around. All types of other bacteria. Ya know fish pee in the water. Yes sir we are battling in diluted fish pee.”

Kuroo grew uncomfortable as he envisioned that horrible scenario.

“Woah I think I feel some fish right now. I hope they are peeing on you.”

In that moment Kuroo felt something graze his leg, “Oh hell No!”

It was just the distraction they needed as Iwaizumi pushed Bokuto off and the opposing two fell into the water. 

“Ladies and gentlemen, Your two new champions!” Iwaizumi roared as he and Daichi flexed their muscles to accentuate their victory.

After getting cleaned up and dried off the group decided to head home. “It was rude to use psychological warfare Daichi. Real rude.”

Daichi chuckled, “I did what I had to do. These dares were getting out of hand”

“Yeah but now we have to find new ways to be entertained.”Bokuto whined.

Oikawa decided to speak up, “Iwa-chan I don’t remember you telling me about doing any crazy dares.”

Kuroo smirked, “Dating you is worse than any dare we could have come up with.”

Iwaizumi shrugged.“I’m not holding him back. You probably have 3 seconds before he kills you.”

Kuroo bolted as an angry Oikawa chased after him.

Daichi smiled, he loved these idiots.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you all enjoyed!
> 
> Comments and Kudos are appreciated and encouraged!


End file.
